What a great family I have! Anna made this bee flower vase for me and then cut some fresh spring flowers from our yard to fill it! She also made me the brownie cake below and added the "Happy Day" message with frosting. I got to blow out the candles and everything :) Seth made a card for me and included a pack of coupons for things like "good for one big hug", "good for one night of setting the table", and "good for one kiss" which he changed to 1,000,000,000 kisses :) Steve even went into town and bought me a top of the line blender which I've been wanting for some time now. Here we come smoothies, margaritas and daiquiris!
So what could the conundrum possibly be? I had visions of laying in bed all day, reading and napping on and off. The perfect day for a worn out mom! The problem was, as soon as Anna got out of bed she wanted to know what we were going to do for Mother's Day. Her suggestions ranged from going into town for ice cream and walking around the shops, to playing a game together. Oh boy. Neither of those things sounded like fun to me. In fact, I considered asking Steve to take the kids to the movie so that I could have the house to myself, but I thought that would be selfish. Instead, I laid in bed, read and napped for a couple hours, but felt obligated to get up and interact with the family after that. As I mentioned in a friend's blog this week, sleep is my guilty pleasure. I felt even more guilty napping today because it seemed like there was this expectation that we should go DO something for Mother's Day. Actually, I should be clear. that was Anna's expectation. Seth was perfectly happy to let me sleep so he could play video games, and Steve was happy with whatever I wanted to do.
So, I guess my question is, does it make me a bad mom to not want to spend time with my family on Mother's Day? I love my family dearly, but today I would have loved nothing more than to have a quiet house to myself with plenty of time for napping and reading without guilt. It is supposed to be MY day after all, but my daughter has a real knack for making me feel guilty that I'm not spending time with her. In the end, I tried to placate her by encouraging her to make brownies (because she loves to bake and it keeps her busy), and making her a smoothie with my new blender. However, I guiltily turned down her offers to play a game on the Wii together. It's just not my thing!
In the end, I feel like it was a good day. I just wish I didn't feel so guilty for wanting to be by myself rather than with my family. After all, everyone needs time to recharge. Whether you're a working mom, dad or devoted partner in a relationship, eventually we all need that time to be alone, decompress and find ourselves again. Hopefully one day my daughter will understand this. Don't get me wrong - she was very supportive of letting me do what I wanted, but I could tell she was disappointed that I wasn't going to go do something special with her. I love the fact that she wants to spend time with me; I just need to find that time for myself too.
3 comments:
I completely understand about "alone time". I needed this BB (Before Baby) and find that it is even more important now. I think it makes me a better parent. It certainly makes me a better person. Your perfect day sounds lovely to me - just add some trashy reality TV, good wine and an even better book and I would be in heaven. For my treat to myself, I'm taking Thursday off and spending it at a spa. Baby will be at daycare, husband will be at work and I will be wrapped in fluffy towels with cucumber slices on my eyes. (Okay, I'm making up the cucumber slices but you get the picture.)
Sounds lovely! School is almost over and once summer's here I'm hoping to get some quiet time. My mom is coming to visit for a couple weeks in June and already said Steve and I could take off for a few days. What will we do with ourselves?! We haven't had a vacation by ourselves for years!
Don't give in to the guilt! Take the day off! Mommy time -- yaaay!!!
Post a Comment